ok, haven't updated for quite a while now... supposed to be doing history test essay correction, but to hell with it at the moment lah. its quite hard to do, seeing it was a S paper question in the first place...
chinese new year holiday has come and gone again. its the same old same old. see the same people, talk the same stuff, do the same things..... its getting to be quite boring, except that i get to play with my cute younger cousins and get red packets! i swear, i will miss getting hongbao when i get married, or rather, IF i get married. getting hongbao is one of the joys of chinese new year. i might not have the chance to get in a few years time.
life goes on as it always will. strange, isn't it, that life and time still go on no matter what has happened. its an ongoing cycle.they both just go on in their methodical way, slowly ticking away each beat, with each second bringing something new. maybe one second, you're typing. next second, you're scratching your nose or something. each second brings about the beginnings of new life and the death of a new one. i don't know if time will ever end, but i plan to make full use of it while im still on this earth. now i sound quite philosophical, don't i?
i don't really have a lot of news to report, except that i've been trying out new churches for the past 3 wks. its not that im tired of my present church, but that im still trying to find God and that sense of peace that i crave. that sense of belonging, of knowing that someone will always be behind me, silently egging me on. for me, that's enough. i've never really gotten a lot of verbal encourgement before, so a silent 'go for it girl!' is more than welcome.
i've always felt as though i would belong in another era. my ideas and values are quite vastly different from many people my age. i've always wondered why i wasn't accepted into groups easily. a few years back, i asked myself if it was my face that turned people off. then i wondered if it was my personality. i don't really speak a lot, u see. i think a lot inside my head. so im not as dull-witted as people might perceive me to be, but for many years, i was crying out for friendship.
maybe, im guillible, too innocent, naive, whatever. but there's more going on behind the mask than you believe..... enough of this sad reflective talk! i still have to get back to my essay, so excuse me while i go figure out what to write next....
Friday, February 04, 2005
well, its been a long time since i updated here, and a lot of things have happened in the meantime. i really have to make this quick, because i have choir in abt 20 mins, and i don't want to be late. muz pay 50 cents leh!!!
terry finally paid his lon overdue debt to me, so that front is pretty much ok. we had quite a nice time today at J8, eat lunch at food court, then wander around J8 until i have to come back for choir. im like stuck outside until about 10 plus pm, because i still have to attend concert at VCH tonight with the choir. but quite happy, because got KFC dinner later. crispy chicken!!! heck care my throat, i want to eat crispy chicken, then i shall suffer for the weekend
tml tuition still got mcq test on production and cost. tried studying yesterday, but never really got much past pg 1. so might have to resign myself to the idea that im doomed to fail tml's test again. the school front is pretty much ok, econs is going as it always does, history too, except that i now have a more vested interest in european history, because it covers one of my favourite aspects of history: world war I. not that i love the war, but the studying of it is rather fun, especially studying about Kaiser William II is really funny. lit is going pretty good too. i never expected mrs teo to find my presentation about the theme of pride really good, since i was coming up with it off the top of my head. now she wants me to lecture on pride during the lecture in 2 wks. bummer. i don't want to lecture. she can say its my work, but i don't think i have the guts to lecture in front of the entire J2 lit cohort.
can't write much more, have to go soon. pearlin's here today, her CJC library came to visit NYJC library today. not really sure how i feel about seeing her again....
simin blogged on 4:16 PM
