ok, haven't updated for quite a while now... supposed to be doing history test essay correction, but to hell with it at the moment lah. its quite hard to do, seeing it was a S paper question in the first place...
chinese new year holiday has come and gone again. its the same old same old. see the same people, talk the same stuff, do the same things..... its getting to be quite boring, except that i get to play with my cute younger cousins and get red packets! i swear, i will miss getting hongbao when i get married, or rather, IF i get married. getting hongbao is one of the joys of chinese new year. i might not have the chance to get in a few years time.
life goes on as it always will. strange, isn't it, that life and time still go on no matter what has happened. its an ongoing cycle.they both just go on in their methodical way, slowly ticking away each beat, with each second bringing something new. maybe one second, you're typing. next second, you're scratching your nose or something. each second brings about the beginnings of new life and the death of a new one. i don't know if time will ever end, but i plan to make full use of it while im still on this earth. now i sound quite philosophical, don't i?
i don't really have a lot of news to report, except that i've been trying out new churches for the past 3 wks. its not that im tired of my present church, but that im still trying to find God and that sense of peace that i crave. that sense of belonging, of knowing that someone will always be behind me, silently egging me on. for me, that's enough. i've never really gotten a lot of verbal encourgement before, so a silent 'go for it girl!' is more than welcome.
i've always felt as though i would belong in another era. my ideas and values are quite vastly different from many people my age. i've always wondered why i wasn't accepted into groups easily. a few years back, i asked myself if it was my face that turned people off. then i wondered if it was my personality. i don't really speak a lot, u see. i think a lot inside my head. so im not as dull-witted as people might perceive me to be, but for many years, i was crying out for friendship.
maybe, im guillible, too innocent, naive, whatever. but there's more going on behind the mask than you believe..... enough of this sad reflective talk! i still have to get back to my essay, so excuse me while i go figure out what to write next....
