hi people. i'm back again, telling you yet another chapter of my life. it is odd, isn't it, that the chapters of my life are spaced apart so far. i tried to put my thoughts into words last week, only to find that the words just would not flow. even now, i hesistate before i type down the next lines, because i simply don't know what to say. there must be a million thoughts swirling around and around in my brain, but everytime i try to catch hold of them, they dart away.
is this going to be an angsty post, you ask. my answer is no. maybe i'm just pouring out what i feel from the multitude of emotions inside my heart. isn't it ironic, i wonder, to feel lonely even among a group of friends? this is not a new emotion, but sometimes i can't help but feel like i've been abandoned. am i just being too sensitive? only i can answer that question. who are we, really? who am I? it does not surprise me in the least to say that i do not know. i used to climb all the way to the highest floor in school, and just stand there, soaking in the warmth of the sun, and the feel of the wind as it blew through my hair. and then, taking in a good breath, i would sing. sing with all my heart and soul, and pour out my aches and pains. free therapy.
well, the choir concert is over now, and i must return to my mundane life of study and lessons and friendships in university. University. what a big word that is. i never thought i would make it here. whether it's me being brutually honest with my own lack of high intelligence, or simply lack of faith in my abilities , i do not know any longer. what is important is that i actually made it.
I am just grateful that my God has been with me all this while. I do not think i would have made it through last week without him, when i was so busy, and was bombarded with tons of different emotions at the same time. now that i have to make decisions on my own, it is so good to have a stalwart shoulder to lean on.
i have my music. i have my sunday school. i have my friends. i have my schoolwork and readings. i have my family. and most of all, i have my God. who will never abandon me. NEVER.
hi people!!! i'm writing to you from university. yup, you read right; this is my very first address from NTU to you. i started lectures this morning, so this morning has been all trying to find my way around campus to all the lecture rooms. it's just lectures this week; next week: the torture begins.
right now i'm on a break. usually i should be in tutorial now. i've decided that i hate mondays. my monday schedule is packed in the afternoon, from 1230 all the way to 1730 without a single break in sight. what's worse, i have to travel from one end of the campus to the other end to get to my various tutorials on monday!!! argh!!! i forsee a lot of mass travelling in the very near future.
i decided to study literature at NTU, and already i'm loaded with very heavy textbooks. they are enormously thick and i wonder how i'm going to be able to remember all that i've studied. also, i'm currently staying in hostel. i've got a cool roomie or 'loomie' as she likes to call me. our room is really cosy, and a little more spacious than others, because we've got a corner room. my next lecture is at 1530, so i still got quite a while to go.
let me continue about my hall. i stay in hall 10, which is on top of a hill. so i climb quite a lot everyday, and my block is on top of on top of the hill, and on the 5th floor. there are no lifts, so basically it's climb up and up and up and up. my 'loomie' and i share a common toilet with all the girls on my flor, but it's basically quite all right. we don't even wash the toilet ourselves; the cleaners do it daily for us. the only complaint that i have is that the toilet is so bloody far away from my room!!!
ok, looks like my roomie wants to leave soon, so i better end here for now. you guys better post comments on my tagboard or i'll come after you!!! haha :) just kidding. see ya!
simin blogged on 9:58 PM
